Herceptin again !

HerceptinHerceptin Day again.

Sometimes it feels never ending. Cancer Free but still in treatment. Cancer Free but a long way from back to the way I was BC (before cancer). That’s if I will ever go back. I suspect I am forever changed. Officially in Remission but not free from treatment or free from the shadow of Cancer.

I now live a new normal.

A more heightened perspective, more likely to live in the now, more decisive with limited patience for negativity and deeper relationships. In many ways so much to be grateful for having learnt a lot.

Stronger in spirit, more resilient and more alive in so many ways but also fragile too – some things burn deep and the memory of pain and illness will take a long time to leave. Right now the thought brings tears unwillingly to my eyes.

Anyway slightly less tears today over the injection itself. Great nurse took it really slow and omg the numbing gel helps with the initial injection of liquid. Reduces the sting a bit.

I’m not feeling great this week so was not looking forward to this. I’m in pain too. Like I took three steps forward after surgery but then hit a snake and slipped back two spaces. A trip into A&E didn’t help did it.

On positive note it’s Friday and last day of term so school is out for summer.

Next week we plan to rest and rest. Asda shopping delivery booked we don’t plan on going anywhere.

Then we will plan our outings for the rest of summer. So looking forward to fun days with the kids. I’ve missed them this year and I know they have missed me too. When Cancer hits it really does affect so many people not just the patient. My cancer has affected my children, my family, my relationships, my work, my life !!! On a positive note it has also taught me a lot. It is truly a bittersweet pill. But learning, really learning the value of a life really lived is one that everyone could do with learning.

(see my Herceptin Info post if you want more info on Herecptin itself)

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