Its ok to feel fed up.
It’s ok to smile.
It’s ok to cry.
It’s ok to laugh.
It’s ok to feel the pain.
Its ok to be strong.
Its ok to feel !!!!
Only the dead don’t feel.
And I’m grateful to be alive.
to be receiving treatment that will keep me alive.
Thank you for modern medicine which today gives a very treatable diagnosis for so many cancer patients.
Thankyou to our amazing NHS and all the wonderful staff that have looked after me so well. The treatment is tough but it’s a cure. It’s life. That’s all that matters.
So I embrace the emotions.
I choose life.
I choose to look to a positive future.
I will cry now and then but mostly I will smile and laugh and kickarse.
Because let’s face it who wants to be a sad cloud. That’s just not me anyway. I am sunshine. I will shine. I will blaze a trail through my treatments no matter how tough. Life can try but it’s not beating this girl !!
I cried when I came around and realised I’d managed to be sick when I was unconscious (I thought I had just passed out – see earlier post for the drama of that) and being a mess isn’t fun.
Then I laughed and said Oh well at least you are patching me up, I’m getting very well looked after and we are almost half way though round 2.
I smiled when the Consultant held my hand and assured me that he knew I would be ok. Then I cried and laughed again when the nurse hugged me and said they all knew I was receiving a really heavy dose of chemo and they all thought I was coping super well.
There are moments you know you can find the positive, the kickarse and the upbeat attitude. But it is also ok to admit there are times when you cry and feel really beat up with the challenge that you have thrown at you.